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/adv/ Advice

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Most viewed threads in this category

Misdiagnosed (?)

22 more posts in this thread. [Missing image file: ]
I think I'm misdiagnosed with schizophrenia. I only have the negative symptoms (though very severely). I also hear my 'own voice' in my head, it's my own self controlled voice. This was according to the professor who diagnosed me enough to qualify as auditory hallucination but I'd disagree with that. I've (thankfully) never had real psychosis. I've also never had catatonia , or disorganized behavior/thinking, or delusions. Now I'm gonna get treatment for schizophrenia. And I don't think I have this. I need help though with the problems I actually have but the professor is retired now and I don't know what to do. No psych is gonna undo a diagnosis of a professor. :/

GIOYC

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Didn't see one.
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I have a sealed 4-pint of milk in the fridge. I accidentally left them fridge open whilst at work (so for about 8 hours). Will the milk be ok to re-refrigerate?
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ok anons, I'm lost. I've been in charge of the cooking and for a while now, after never having been interested in it in all my life. The food I cook is edible, but just that. Nothing tasty enough to earn a compliment, or a specific dish request. I kept trying to learn from recipe books and the internet, I follow instructions carefully, but I'm just now accepting the fact that my cooking fucking sucks and I feel like shit for putting my family through having to eat it. When i taste my food there's always that feeling that something is missing, something is not right. all i ever say after tasting my food is "meh" so maybe here, where people are brutally honest (pic related) maybe someone could share whatever advice they may have on how to get the basics of cooking right. I don't want to cook like a chef; getting someone to compliment my food or ask for seconds would be enough.
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I've been with my current gf for 3 months and she says she wants to spend her christmas with me and my family. My parents want to meet her too, but my brother and friends think our relationship is moving too fast. Do you guys think its weird or going too fast also? I'm confused as hell

ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

156 more posts in this thread. [Missing image file: ]
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers. And please no derailing arguments. Avoid asking these common questions: >Is it normal for me to go to a club/bar by myself? Yes. Stop overthinking this. >Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>? Some do, some don't. >I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do? Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it. >I like someone. What do I do? Ask them out. >How can I tell if someone likes me? Ask them out. >Where do I meet girls/guys? Anywhere outside. Or online. >Is my body part big/small enough? >Am I short/tall enough? Most likely >Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean? Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it. >XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl? Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that. >This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this? Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing >Would you date a virgin? As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off. >Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance? No >Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date? Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city> >That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking >Brandon or Female Brandon Piss off. >Frog Also piss off.
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Has anyone used "Badoo" here? I have a question. Today I found my boyfriend on it and it says that he wasn't active for over a week? Does that just mean he wasn't on for a week or 2 or could it mean he wasn't active for a couple months. He's claiming that he hasn't been on it since we got together but it dosnt say anything about months.
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Why are more and more men seemingly afraid to approach women now? It seems that as the years go by, less guys are making the first move. And almost come off like they're devolving into misogyny and bitterness now.
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People like me way to much. The anxiety for maintaining relationships is intolerable. How do I make people bored with me?
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Whenever I go out to eat with family or friends unless they're really close friends, I always end up getting up and walking away to the bathroom to just stand there and fake using the bathroom to get away from the social interaction. It doesn't scare me its just so infuriating the kinds of things some people talk about. So empty and boring. Anyone else do similar things? How do you stop doing this?

Prenup

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Me and my fiance, who is 11 years older than me, have agreed to a prenup before we get married. I'm much younger and a student with no income, whereas he owns two companies, a house worth ~$400k, and 3 very nice BMWs, etc etc. I thought it was common sense that we'd sign one and I'd have worried if he hadn't of brought it up. It was just something I always assumed we'd do because it's smart on his part and I don't date idiots. He also has slight trust issues because his brother, who he had made his business partner, royally screwed him over. The only issues is, when I read the prenup, it said that if I signed, I'd be waiving my right to spousal support. Hypothetically, if we were married and he started cheating on me, if I wanted a divorce because of that I'd be completely on my own, with only our divided marital property, and my small income that I had garnered working for him (plus in the event of a divorce I'd no longer be working for him and have any income). No alimony payments on his part. Is this even legal? Would this prenup even stand in court? I am currently 8 months pregnant, and as soon as we sign this thing we are getting courthouse hitched (my family is very traditional and would disinherit me if we had a child out of wedlock). I mean isn't the law super accommodating for women? I'm 11 years younger (21), 8 months pregnant, and a full-time student. Wouldn't those factors alone be enough to throw out a prenup in court? All I'd have to say is that I was under duress/pressure, right? Don't misunderstand, I love this man dearly and would never be unfaithful, and would always try and work things out before considering a divorce, especially since we have a child, but I'm just making sure my ass is protected in case he turns out to be a cheater. I've been cheated on by all my exes and it's just something I won't stand for. P.S. I plan to stay in great shape, give him sex whenever he wants it, etc.
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I recently went on a two month alcohol binge. I am three days into it, and the slight withdrawal that I did have has basically subsided. It did not warrant me hospitalizing myself. I basically drank myself into a stupor most nights, having 6-12 drinks most of the time. On average I would say that I had about 8 per night. If I quit now, will I be good? Have I fucked my brain beyond where it would have been otherwise? Will my liver be okay? How do I stay off this shit? I come from a family of addicts. I have had trouble with drugs and alcohol in the past, but this is the longest I have ever been doing something day after day. Also, do I have a chance to make a full recovery brain-wise from several years of on and off substance abuse? How about long term effects? Any anecdotal/scientific insight would be great. Thanks /b/ros.
27 more posts in this thread. [Missing image file: ]
inb4 the usual "hurrr muslim terrorist, shitskin, mudslime etc.." >be a normal Muslim guy who was born in the UK and grew up here >went to university, keep to myself and have a few friends >keep running into one guy through a group of friends >served in the army and in Afghanistan, lost a leg to a suicide bomber >is labelled as a hero, don't actually say anything to him >start to see more and more of him, he's always extremely racist towards me >guess that maybe he's bitter about losing his leg or something, never reply and try to ignore him >attacks me one night until he's pulled off me >sends me racists comments over Facebook, block him >somehow gets my telephone number, sends me texts; which I also ignore >browsing the web today and see that the media and random websites are sharing his FB status about not being racist >being praised and lauded all over the place Do I just carry on ignoring this or should I speak up? I've got screenshots of everything he's said to me as well as all the original texts and messages. Is it just PTSD or something that's causing him to act this way towards me? His comments range from "I enjoyed kill you cunts out there, I wish I could go back" "You're next on my list" etc.. http://www.theladbible.com/articles/someone-who-had-their-leg-blown-up
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I've got to buy this Danish girl something for secret santa, but I have no idea what to buy. She hardly speaks so I know virtually nothing about her. Other people are buying funny/not serious things, I might do this but I need help choosing something to buy. Could someone please help me? She's about 20 and we're in the UK if that helps.

ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

7 more posts in this thread. [Missing image file: ]
Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers. And please no derailing arguments. Avoid asking these common questions: >Is it normal for me to go to a club/bar by myself? Yes. Stop overthinking this. >Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>? Some do, some don't. >I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do? Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it. >I like someone. What do I do? Ask them out. >How can I tell if someone likes me? Ask them out. >Where do I meet girls/guys? Anywhere outside. Or online. >Is my body part big/small enough? >Am I short/tall enough? Most likely >Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean? Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it. >XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl? Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that. >This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this? Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing >Would you date a virgin? As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off. >Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance? No >Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date? Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city> >That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking >Brandon or Female Brandon Piss off. >Frog Also piss off.

bf won't dance

142 more posts in this thread. [Missing image file: ]
Me and my bf are together three years now. We get along great, but we always have problems because we are fundamentally different in one aspect - He's a quiet type, and I'm outgoing and physical. Its an ongoing frustration. The thing where this hurts most is with dancing. I just love dancing. I love watching couples dancing, and now that I finally found the man I want to be with, I want to dance with him, share that euphoria with him. But he won't. He says he feels awkward, and that's that. Its not a small thing for me. When we go out and listen to music we both like, I see all those couples dancing and having a blast, and I can't fucking join. I have to stay sitting like a granny. It makes me feel like a wallflower, and it makes me look at my bf like he was plain and uninteresting. Dancing is not only fun, it is also ver attractive. It basically means a man is confident, physically fit, social, curageous, happy... In my mind, men who dance are top-tier, and I think most women would agree. Seeing my bf incapable of it makes me very disappointed. I do try to inspire him now and then, like I try and not sit down but stand in a bar, so I can move a little. He sometimes bobs his head to the beat - but when I go up to him start dacing a bit more "with him" he freezes up and does not even try. > tl;dr: long-term bf just won't dance, this sucks. How do you see this? If you are male, do you dance, and if no, why not? I'm sure you see the fun of dancing too, I think ist mostly shyness. What would help you overcome this shyness?
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Guys who are 20+ years old and are kissless virgins: How do you deal with that fact? It just makes me really depressed, I can't even watch most TV shows/movies anymore without seeing relationships that remind me of my own failure of a life
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I've never been able to get over the only 'relationship' I ever had, which was with my friend's ex. We were never a couple and I knew that, but we'd been close friends for more than a year, were sleeping with each other, hanging out all the time, and had plans to carry on doing all of those things. Then she met someone she liked better and started sleeping with him. When I told her how hurt I was, she pretty much told me that we'd never been anything more than casual and she'd never had feelings for me. We went back to being the 'just friends' that she said we'd always been, but everything had changed. She'd still message me every now and then (at first every few days, then every few weeks, then every few months) to check up on me, but never came to see me in person. I deliberately made sure we drifted apart and fell out of contact, and she never told me she missed our friendship. Last month, a year after I'd deleted her on everything and two years after she'd ended it with me, she contacted me again for another check up, and I finally ask her not to contact me again. I explain to her that I have positive memories of her and that friendship was very important to me, but this is the only way for me to move forward. Even then, she doesn't admit that she'd ever cared about the relationship, she just says 'I'm glad you got some use out of me and have happy memories'. Does it make sense that this is the reason why I've found it so hard to move on? I got closure, but I never accepted it because it just didn't make sense. I either wanted her to admit that she did have feelings for me but lost them when she met someone else or that she'd never had feelings for me at all and was just using me to get back at her ex. I feel like it would be easier to move on from either of those, but this insistence that I just 'wasn't ready' for a casual relationship doesn't reflect the way I experienced it all, and makes me feel like there's something she didn't tell me.
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tldr; girlfriend is terrible in bed and at being sexual... My girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for nearly a year now, we are both in our 20s, and she recently moved in to live with me. I have brought it up a few times that it bothers me alot that she is never sexual, that I have to literally force her hand onto my dick prior to me kissing her, rubbing her thighs, boobs or pussy. I have to literally say to her "Can we fuck?" and be in control all the time when we do. I can't stand the lack of spontaneousness or ability to think for herself, the sex is all very robotic, it makes me feel unappreciated as I practically do everything for her. I even have to use condoms everytime as she will forget to take the pill or go into a full panic mode if I attempt to duck her without. Obviously sex isn't everything in a relationship, but it does mean alot. I notice the main issue she is very shy and socially awkward with confidence issues, but other than these issues I love her for her other traits.
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Hey everyone. I've been going through some emotional trauma since last night, when my girlfriend told me that she's not a virgin. Some background: we're both Catholics, I actually met her at church, and we've been dating almost four months. Last night during a deep discussion she admitted to me that she had been (very) sexually active with her last boyfriend, who was not a Catholic. It was brave of her to tell me this but now I absolutely torn apart. I'm split between feeling completely betrayed, very jealous, and honestly just lost. I can't talk to friends or family about this, very few of them hold the same values as me and wouldn't understand. I really don't know how to move forward from this. As a Catholic, I see dating as a means to end (marriage) and I wouldn't keep dating a girl that I thought was incompatible with me for marriage. Now that I've learned this, I don't know what to do. I know, I know, we should always forgive, but I've never had to forgive anything this serious before. I just can't stop thinking about how not only did she turn her back on her faith and morals, but also betrayed me (or whomever her future husband is). And personally, I don't know if I'd be able to marry someone who has done this; I get a sickening sense of disgust and anger whenever I think about it, which has been constantly. Any advice you have on how to address this, I could really use it.






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