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Hey /adv/, I do not need help or your opinion of AA or NA.
I have been sober for a year, I no longer desire liquor and I am actively sponsoring two newcomers.
Im still a huge liar. I tell everyone god or a higher power has kept me sober and sane this long, but when i pray i feel nothing and its been like that since the beginning. I am scared to tell my sponsor about this because I talk about how important it is to have a higher power in order to stay sober to everyone.
Im scared because i do not want to go back and i know how important it is to have a power greater than yourself in order to achieve long term (lifelong) sobriety.
hopefully that makes sense, thank you for your input.
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So, this is going to be a bit weird, but
>went out with girl
>she wants to take it real slow, recently broke up with bf of like 5-6 years
>we go out on 3 dates before we even kiss
>first kiss she's really, really nervous and shy
>just that kiss
>have a few moments where she wants to let me know she's probably not ready for something serious right this moment, but still want to date and see where it goes
>next time we go out, again a few small, innocent kisses
>next time we go outI kiss her, I naturally try to put a tiny bit of tongue (situation was more suitable)
>she doesn't really respond so much
>I don't mind and turn it into an innocent kiss on the lips again
>go out again
>only innocent kisses again
Now, the problem here is that so far my relationship lubricant has largely been alcohol. Get drunk with girl, make out with her, etc. This girl is sober. I don't know how to progress physically with her. I'm scared she'll think I'm too much of a prude or not attracted to her. Am I right in this or is what I'm doing basically ok?
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So I'm dating this guy. Great guy, my best friend before we started dating for several years, my first boyfriend and right now my only friend who I actually care about.
The thing is though, I don't care for him romantically. And neither does he, in that way.I think I pressured him into this, he's a really nice guy so when I confessed.. You get the idea. I only crushed on him for a little while, now I.. I don't know. Still the only person I actually care to see.
He makes me miserable though. It's hard watching him be so withdrawn. He's affectionate but clearly doesn't care.
I would break up with him but I'm just afraid of being judged. I'm already an outcast, I hate social contact and avoid it like the black plague. I'm just too tired for any actual new friendships. There's also the problem that I don't speak the language much, just roughly. But it's really tiring to speak and actually socialize.
My boyfriend, he goes to the same school as me and a lot of people have been envious that I'm dating someone while they're not. He's pretty cute too, and shares a lot of girly interests. So a bunch of girls have already shown interest in him.
Anyway, I just don't want to end up alone. I don't want to be laughed at, I don't want people to be like "oh wow she's so weird, nobody wants to be with her."
I'm already so alone..
He's a good guy, knows me better than anyone ever has, and I'm happy to have him.
Being in this relationship has given me the physical affection I've lacked my whole life but I think he's not very glad either.
Please, I know it's selfish, but I'm just so tired of being the outcast. I hope you of all people understand me, 4chan...
Should I stay with him or break up?
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I have big plans for the future,I intend on taking much of the world,and sculpting it to become a better place,with a very low worldwide crimerate,I have drawn up plans of action,for either of the following options; Starting a rebellion,though far harder,it would give me the ability to create the law as I see fit,the other option is to become the elected leader of my country,and do it that way,im wondering,should I try and carry out either of these options,and if I did,would I go down in history as an evil person?
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How do you get over feelings for a friend you see regularly? How do you move on, but keep the friendship intact?
I completely misinterpreted the relationship this girl and I had. When we first met, we hit it off great, she was flirty (I thought) and we quickly made plans together. We were in touch all the time, and I fell for her so badly. When her schedule picked up, our weekly 'dates' stopped. We haven't gone out since, but we still see each other daily in class and shit. Some more time passed, and we bonded more. However, the chemistry we used to have was gone completely. Her effort went to zero, but she was legitimately busy, I could see that every day. I felt rejected and hurt, but still lingered because she wasn't lying about her tight schedule. And no, this wasn't a case of
>girls can't be 100% busy 100% of the time
I started feeling needy and desperate, and my attempts to meet with her got more and more frequent and pathetic. Eventually I cracked. She stressed me out so much that it physically wore me down. I decided enough was enough, and took her aside to tell her my feelings and ask for hers. That moment where we could be honest to each other about each other was the most calming thing I've experienced in weeks. She shot my romantic feelings down, but the way she did it, the way we interacted afterwards, it was that dynamic we'd lost so long ago. I now know that that was the friendship we had, and I want to keep it without turning things awkward.
I want to lose my feelings for this girl and be as close as we used to be. There's so much that I still want to tell her, but there's no way I can do that without blurring the line between friend and creep once more.
So yeah, I want to lose my feelings and keep my friendship. How do I do that?
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I don't know what to do and I think I'm not in mental condition to make decisions like this.
Let me start with an awful cliché love story.
I have a friend (girl). We are friends for a long time (7+ years) and I always had a crush on her. We sometimes flirt and she always talks about how she hates her boyfriend etc. and I recently broke up and now it finally happened. We were drunk, some kind of love song was playing on the radio, she touched my hand, I grabbed her hand, we started kissing. Took few minutes. We calmed down, we started again. I probably said something about it being a stupid situation, we went to sleep in separate rooms.
Now I can't get her out of my head. Don't forget I already had a crush on her so now is everything ten times worse than it was before.
We spent some time together after this incident but we didn't talk about it at all.
I want to talk about it.
I want to tell her how I feel.
I want to know how she feels.
The most painful thing about all this is not knowing anything.
I want to know if that meant anything to her or if that was just a fling and there's no chance we'll ever end up together.
Because I think I'm able to get over this if I know there's no chance and we'll still be able to be friends.
My question is:
How do I get her to talk about this and generally "wat do"?
NEET and Shut-In Advice Thread (Version 121) Star Wars Christmas edition
53 more posts in this thread. [Missing image file: ]
Welcome to the NEET and Shut-in advice thread!
(Version 121, running since Oct. 31st, 2013)
REMINDER: This isn't >>>/r9k/ or wizardchan
Drop out of school due to anxiety? Haven't left the house in a few years? Maybe you have a job, but don't leave the house or talk to people for any reason outside of it? Finding a job sure is hard these days.
The best time to change your life was 5 years ago. But the good news is, the second best time is right now!
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